The subliminal thinking - being female is an insult

What’s the worse you can call a guy? The ultimate insult for a macha would be, “Dei, pudavai eduthu kattikoda potte paiye.” (Go tie a saree you feminine guy) Others maybe faggot, sissy, cunt, cibai, pondan, punde and potte. All those derogatory terms used at guys are FEMALE. So, being female is something insulting, a shame and mostly unwanted conclusion can be inferred here.

I was watching an old movie titled Manalaney Mangaiyin Baghyam starring Anjalai Devi and Gemini Ganesan. Gemini gets cursed to live as a woman by day and himself by night and he goes all dejected, “Ithu enna vibaritham, itharku vimoshanam illeya?” (What is this disaster? Doesn’t this have a retraction?) Also, Sikandini resenting her female birth and she exchanging her gender with one of Kubera’s Yakshas and him asking her to return his male gender before Kubera comes because Kubera dislikes women. Sikhandini fails to come on time to return her male gender to Yaksha - Kubera cursed the Yaksha to be a woman forever by the time Sikhandi arrives and Yaksha would lament her fate.

All these point to the fact that being a woman is undesirable and worse, lowly. Indians have this entrenched - a guy was like, ‘pottechi pece keatu thala kuniya naa onnum potta paiya ille, ambala’. He asserted that losing to a girl is a humiliation to him because he’s a man. As admins of KK, we’ve come across so many guys rubbing that they’re ambala and kept at pressuring us to capitulate - thotute nu otthuko (accept your defeat)

All these is the result of women depicted to be an inferior gender, weak, emotional, tenuous and that these are undesirable qualities for men when all of it are human - due to that see how wide the gender gap has got! Women are painted with a glossover that they’re unable to make sound decisions and make things work - potte koli koovi poluthu vidiyathu (the sun doesn’t rise at the crowing of a hen - see how they uplift the status of being male, the sun will rise at males’ beck and call and degrade women, nothing will happen at a woman’s behest), unable to think clearly and for themselves, have their own autonomy and freedom and mostly her own way. Women are confined in a tiny circle driven by the belief on behalf of men and sometimes women themselves that they are weak, don’t know what’s good/bad for them hence should be restricted under the name of protection, religion and culture. All these we see - girls shouldn’t wear short-short, shouldn’t be a party animal, shouldn’t do this and that are a reflection of that.

Even god is generally referred to as a He. In the bible, childbirth pain is said to be a punishment because women are inherently sinful creatures - epidural changed that, science baby. In Jainism, women are said to be sacs of excreta and other filth and the one we all are too familiar with, menstruating women are dirty. There is nothing defaming descriptives like this for men.

In managing a page that advocates gender equality, the harassment we get from machas who feel how can girls say anything about guys is immense. There are so many Malaysian Indian pages directed to shame girls, including vandi punde pages and no one guy bothered to open a page to counter those pages that are hell bent on reprimanding so called ‘wayward women’ but one page for women - to reverse patriarchy and pave way for parity in gender matters in the Indian community and so much of opposition from machas from the outset - unbridled harassment. We wake up each day with dread on what kind of machas will we need to face today.

Before you think of calling and insulting a guy by terming him all things feminine like ‘potte, cibai, cunt, punda, etc’ remember that if it wasn’t for that feminine attributes, you won’t be here. Henceforth stop this subconscious perception that being a woman is an insult. Being a pottechi isn’t in any way, inferior than being an ambala. Losing to a woman doesn’t make you emasculated - in the face of logic and reason, gender superiority and inferiority loses hands down. Females are combating in the frontlines of battlefield - the Kurdish all female army. Men are becoming nurses. There is no such thing as pombele pombeleya irukanum (women should be like women) or ambala ambalaya irukanum (men should be like men) - so many problems due to that gender roles assigning. Gender roles are toxic. Female or male, there is a gender fluidity running in between - pay attention to that gender fluidity and give up on your Padayappa ideals for women.