"Unnai Ninaithu's Laila is Ashwini" How Tamil Cinema has Rotted Brains

And, lobby for women's financial independence - only then women can equally spend in a relationship

The allegation:

- For two years both Ashwini and Azhagesan have been in a relationship - Aswini has no father. Her mother is a domestic worker and she raised Ashwini as a single mother.
- It is Azhagesan who spent money to educate Ashwini for 2 years - Ashwini and her mother happily accepted the guy's money.
- After using the guy and his money for 2 years, Ashwini and her mother realised that the guy isn't a good life partner.
-  If a boy proposes to a girl & if the girl says "No", it's rejection... Completely harmless... But if the boy & girl are in love for 2 years... Girl using the boy's hard earned money... The girl getting education, and later dumping him. This is not rejection.
- Clearly the girl was using him... It's nothing but cheating the guy in the name of love.
- If guy never paid a penny for the girl's education The girl, after 2 years of dating, realized the guy isn't good... SHE CAN DUMP HIM... Yes, she can... Nothing wrong about it...
- Why are you supporting the girl as if she's Kannagi?
- Just because she was killed, how can you forget how she used the guy?
- I'm not supporting the guy - what he did is 100% wrong.
- I am just saying you are one sided KK.
- It's like watching "Unnai Ninaithu" film and supporting "Laila" character...

KK's reply:

Ashwini is in first year of college. And, here you say that Azhagesan had spent his money to educate Ashwini for 2 years. If you do the math, Ashwini was still in school 2 years before when she was allegedly in relationship with Azhagesan. So, when did he sponsor her college education? If Ashwini's mother could educate Ashwini up to completing school, she could give her daughter college education. This shit doesn't add up. 

Look, what you are blatantly stating is, "If I spend for you, you must do what I expect from you." This is male entitlement and it's also prevalent in the west, "Bitch, I paid for the date so you must have sex with me!" Men think women owe them, especially if they spend money for them. Only thing, in the west, this phenomenon isn't peppered by true love and sentimental shit. Neither do the men there typically resort to violence; they just scold the woman, "What a fucking, ungrateful, gold digging bitch." In some cases, abuse and date rape happen. If I am going to give you another example, many Indian guys think that if a girl accepts his friend request, she must reply to their chats. If not, their responses range from:

• If you don't like to talk, why accept my friend request?
• Fucking bitch, fuck you, @$%^&*_
• You won't reply me ah?
• Hey, reply
• "Incessant messaging" Hi, hlo, Bebe, Busy? Ping me when you free.

And, imagine dozens of guys doing this just because a girl accepted their friend request since she found the guy's profile interesting and his posts witty and relatable. Take your number, 16 and wait for her reply. And, girls have work too you know!

So, no. Ashwini didn't use Azhagesan. He did all these stuff to impress her and felt that he is entitled to her. Things didn't work out between them, so she walked out and this guy kept at trying and persisting, thinking it's romance and that he 'earned' her which is explained by forcibly tying thali around her neck. Who knew what Azhagesan did for Ashwini to think he's not a good life partner? He could have abused her (if he can forcefully tie thali, he is capable of abuse) and Ashwini is supposed to stay with him just because he spent money for her? And, who the fuck are you to decide 'valid and invalid reasons' for a girl to walk out from a relationship? This line here, "If guy never paid a penny for the girl's education The girl, after 2 years of dating, realized the guy isn't good... SHE CAN DUMP HIM... Yes, she can... Nothing wrong about it..."

The problem here is not romance, trying, or persistence. The problem here is the belief that guys need to do something for girls to like them. And its even more sinister cousin: that girls are something to be earned. So goes the belief: “I’ll do A, B and C for her, and (despite my fifty flaws and the hundred practical reasons it would never work) she will like me.” Now to the list add the Indian male perception fuelled by Tamil movies, "She won't leave me, after all, I did so much for her. She will marry me." And when things fall apart, these guys will rave on and on about trust and being cheated. They don't respect the feelings of the girls or their decision as an autonomous being at all. 

If money that you spent on her is your bone, then ask it back from her. If you say, "No, this is not business or debt to repay. It's about trust. I love her truly. Who cares about money?" I will slap you. Isn't you expecting her to be with you forever because you spent for her a business deal? And, isn't the money spent on the girl the core issue for you? Then what mannangati trust-u, love-u, it's not about kaasu?

Yep, entitlement everywhere. There's female entitlement too, That's a topic for another day.

Of course there are girls who purposely lead guys on, try to get free stuff from them and then act all innocent. If you’ve been manipulated before, I’m sorry bro… I feel you.
But by and large the population isn’t out to swindle you. Girls don’t wake up every day thinking how to screw you over. Most women are just as confused as you are in the whole dating process.
But they’re ten times more afraid of being hurt, and a hundred times more afraid of being seen as a slut.

We don't want girls to use anyone's money but their own hard earned money. That's why we lobby so intensely for girls' education and job going. In the old page, we posted so much for women to be financially independent, do Dutch and not rely on men for everything and anything. 

When we post all that, none of you guys come and lend support. Instead, you make memes asking what women do after scoring so high in exams and say if a girl makes round dosa, she's marriage material which KK counters.

You can't stand women being so independent they say they only need your sperm cells to make babies. Stem cells potential is even more exciting.

It's 2018, and yet there are Facebook debates on the topic whether women should be educated or not. When your parents won't educate your sister like they do you, you don't protest. When your parents plan to marry you off to a girl who's fresh out of school or college, you don't resist the alliance. You won't take any step towards women's education and job going and even if you do, you expect the girl to marry you. You think the women owe you.

The ultimate stupidity is linking this to a stupid Tamil movie full of typical shit that brought our community to this level. Not only Unnai Ninaithu, Johny has a similar storyline. Rajini buys the heroine sarees (he advises her to be satisfied with what she has when she starts saying that one saree is better after another) and makes her his maid. When she rejects Rajini's proposal because he's a barber and goes with another man, Rajini kills both of them.

You better learn the facts - women don't owe you. You can't earn a woman by doing things for her. A woman has a mind of her own. Guys, you too, don't spend huge sums of money for a woman and then play victim as bleeding hearts filled with true love when your expectations from the woman aren't met. Instead, lobby for women's education and job going without getting insecure and disdainful. It will be a win-win situation. 

Kannagi is a stupid woman, created to fulfill our stupid culture regarding how a woman should be. 

The guy who accused KK of being one sided by supporting Ashwini narrated his sob story:

"FYI, ennoda ex-lover was also like ashwini... Using me for money, expensive things like shopping, beauty parlor, dressing, movies, hotels, etc... She was using my debit card... Also I paid her mobile bill...    Later she dumped me coz her parents found a well settled mappillai from canada... She married that guy within a month after our breakup... U can ask me 1000 beautiful questions about my love... I can't answer even a single question... Bcoz I was madly in love with her... I thought she is my wife, life partner, blah blah blah... I was extremely naive and never for a second thought she was using me, until the second she broke our relationship..."

Okay buddy, my elder sister is blacklisted - she can't open a bank account, go overseas or own any property or vehicle because of her ex boyfriend. He had taken bank loan to buy a car and made my sister sign as guarantor. He had also used her salary and pawned her gold jewels. She never sent any money for my mother or me - she had spent all of it for him. He left my sister once he found a prettier, fair girl - my sister is dark. I still remember seeing my sister cry and calling him up and crying on the phone. I was 13 then. She moved on and had an arranged marriage and her ultimate marriage gift was bankruptcy status. Till today, my sister is still paying her ex's debt. Her EPF is at risk to be confiscated by the bank and so is the house which is on my mother and her name. 

But I have never told this story on KK - neither to anyone. Look, my sister lost everything and is at risk of losing EVERYTHING.  Yet, she never raved about her gold digging ex bf like you guys - she never said, "I gave him so much yet he left me when he found a prettier girl." Mind you, she can't even have a deposit account. Thandathukku, she's paying money every month for the debt her ex took. Yet, she lives on, uncomplaining. My mother blames her only for being stupid - apdi enna kadhal, sambaricha kaasu serthu vekkama, enukku anupama avanukku kudutha? A woman is always blamed no matter what. 

Ungalku vantha rattham. Engalku vantha thakkali chutney uh?