Teenagers today and the ‘Purushan –Pondati” Name calling

This might be an old issue or something that everyone has come across with but we felt the need to address it before it becomes a pandemic. If a married couple refers to each other as purusha –pondati (husband –wife), that’s normal. Now, what is abnormal is when you have a bunch of school going kids running around referring to each other as husband and wife on social media. The problem here is that these kids who are still dependent on their parents for everything including sanitary pad, underwear, food and pocket money think it’s so damn endearing to refer to each other as my pondati (my wife) and my purusha (my husband). And we have a bunch of adults who actually find this very cute. No, nope it is not cute, no they are not fooling around, no, it is not just a joke and no this should not be taken lightly.

Let us tell you why this is a serious issue that you should never brush aside. Not long ago, we had a meenachi tying a yellow rope with ring around her neck and claiming that’s her thali (sacred marriage thread) tied by her so called purusha (boyfriend). It was hyped up by even THR Raaga and then everything is back to the usual purusha –pondati name calling among teenagers. Before you start referring to each other as husband and wife, learn what the words mean. Those words are not meant to allow you to date your karat macha/meenachi, cut school, roam around on that karat’s EX5 bike and hang out at cinemas or supermarkets, go do sneaky, intimate stuffs while stupidly recording them and then carelessly uploading them on social media. While you may think it’s cute and indicates the amount of love that you have for each other- what it really portrays is the immature and shallow mentality that you have. Have you ever seen adults flaunting their relationship as purusha-pondati? You will never catch married couples calling each other this way in public or social media. This is because being purusha-pondati comes with huge responsibilities and burdens. It is more than just kissing, hugging and spending time with each other. Somehow, meenachis and machas who are still living with their parents can’t be bothered with responsibilities. They only want the fun part in a relationship which involves screwing each other without being bogged down with challenges and difficulties in life. Responsibility na eppadi spell penne teriyathe school pillaigal lam ippo purusha-pondati nu sollikittu tirithungge (School students who don’t even know how to spell the word responsibility are referring to themselves as husband and wife).

We have seen a number of Indians out there (both men and women) who are well into their 30s and are still single. They are successful, career orientated, have a stable job and earning capacity. The amazing part is that you don’t see these successful people rushing into a relationship. In fact, some even shy away from getting a life partner because they are not sure whether things will work out in the long run. If successful adults can think so much before committing themselves to marriage, what makes teenagers like you who have nothing (no job, no earnings) to think that being purusha-pondati is easy? Maturity comes as you age and when you reach that age, getting married may not be as easy as you thought. And referring to each other as husband and wife may no longer hold the same level of euphoria or excitement like what it does to you now when you are still in school. We hope teenagers – no matter how much you are in love with your boyfriend/girlfriend, avoid referring to each other as purusha-pondati. It’s like using the phrase ‘I love you’ so many times that it becomes meaningless. Use it when you are really getting married to your choice of life partner, then it will be more meaningful. To meenachis who are still in school especially, 10 years from now when you look back at this whole purusha-pondati label which you liked so much, you will feel disgusted that you have used it on someone who might be just a temporary fling, crush or mere flirt. We hope to curb this purusha-pondati sentiment among teenagers before it deteriorates to a worst level in the near future.

And, adults, instead of commenting ‘so cute’, ‘beautiful couple’ and comments yang sewaktu dengannya on pictures of such teen purushan pondati, tell them to go study and watch cartoons.