Indian women thinking they are unequal
On the comment above
For generations, the Indian women have been continuously reminded that they are always one step lower than the Indian men. This can also be observed with the many cultural practices which favours men but is downright discriminating for women. Now, when an Indian lady says that –‘ wife eppome husband shoulder ku oru padi kile irukanum, illena family nasama aidum – It enforces the notion that the Indian woman is not capable of leadership or decision making. It also highlights that only the Indian men can lead a family no matter how less educated, unemployed or irresponsible he is.
How can one even relate a woman’s higher level of education and career to family ‘nasama aidum” (falling apart) in today’s context is perplexing? Let’s just go deeper into this statement and I will use myself as an example. I am a career woman with several higher degrees. I hold a management position in my company. My daily routine includes doing paperwork, holding meetings with top management and other staffs, giving out instructions, leading teams to project completion and conducting CSR activities.
Now, the logic is as simple as if I can lead a team of strangers (consisting of both genders of different race and religion) to complete projects and conduct assignments, don’t you think I can lead my family? Under my leadership, yen company enna nasama va ponuchi?
So, why Indian women being more dominant and assertive within a family can lead to family falling apart? This is a conditioned thinking that has been etched within the Indian society for such a long time that no one questions it. It is rationally flawed because not all men make good leaders and not all women make bad leaders. Why a woman will utter such statement? Maybe she has a good husband who is a good family leader. Maybe she has a weaker personality and prefers her husband to make important decisions. Maybe she was not exposed to an environment where she has to take control and handle conflicts or find solutions to problems. Maybe she is used to having a man dominating her life. Maybe she belonged to yesteryear generation of women who believed women can never make good family leaders (she is around 30-40 years old). But it is wrong to say that families will fall apart under a woman’s/wife’s leadership.
The Indian society has yet to accept that a wife is equal to husband. From allowing husbands to eat first to shaming women who file for divorce and re-marry, the society has placed women one step lower than men. And we all know this is to preserve the fragile male ego. However, this notion no longer fits or applicable as Indian women today have progressed so much in terms of education and career. In a marriage, there is no such thing as who is greater or better….there is only who makes the correct and timely decisions that benefit everyone within the family. Both husband and wife should operate as singular unit and have mutual respects for each other.
The only reason why family ‘nasama aidum’ is when the Indian men feel entitled for being born a male and tries to enslave their wives. We hope the Indian society will stop such screwed up thinking and treat both genders equally.
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